January 1, 2018
Writers on Writing: “The role of the writer is not to say what we can all say but what we are unable to say.” – Anïs Nin
Unlike the authors referenced in this passage, I do not write to voice the oppressed. I write to voice myself. My voice has never been heard in my family life nor in my friendships and relationships. I write to voice myself and people like me who feel unheard and stuck in their silence where people do not understand and so not try to understand. There are so many people, like me, who suffer silently from social anxiety and depression and the overwhelming fear of unacceptance. I want to fight for those people by not being afraid to write and voice my opinions, feelings, thoughts, etc. through my fiction and poetry and through my occasional political/social voice.
I feel as though nobody in the states takes mental illness seriously anymore because of the giant influx of people self-diagnosing themselves with these ‘disorders’ over the past ten years or so. Now, I do not disagree with those people that self-diagnose that they have the feelings they have. But, in doing so they take away from the people that are actually suffering a great deal and are too afraid to get help or cannot afford to get help. I write for those people and I write for myself. May we be heard.
January 2, 2018
Motivation: “The indispensable first step to getting the things you want in life is this: decide what you want.” – Ben Stein
I particularly enjoyed this passage as I am most definitely at a loss for what kind of writer I want to be/become and where I want my writing to take me. My writing brings me a sort of solace, an escape, a wonderland where anything is possible and my pain is extinguished, if even for a short while. I also have a deep love for those blunt quotes about being a better you or living a better life…they provide that clear thinking that I seem to be lacking in my own mind. I thrive off of them. Perhaps that is my downfall as a writer? I strive to write these long pieces of fiction and yet I always find myself writing short bursts of poetry and prose and they never seem to add up to much more than a few lines that I cannot get out of my head. Throughout this journey, I hope to figure out which side of the coin is my calling. Heads: Novels. Tails: Pointless Quotes.
January 3, 2018
Writing Class: Write a short biography about your best friend.
Flames bursting through the cracks of the Earth. This is what I think of when I think of him. The fire in my heart was put out long before he entered my world, but he managed to relight it with the flames of his own.
What truly amazes me, however, is that he had any fire left after the pain he has experienced in his time on this planet. He has been cheated, lied to, abandoned, forgotten, abused, neglected, left behind, and torn apart by those he gave his whole heart to. Perhaps this is why I find myself wondering if there is more to his heart that I have yet to see? I feel he hides.
His journey began in Florida and took him North to where we eventually met, in North Carolina. In the in-between, he found himself in Minnesota, Arizona, and southern California, but he came back to North Carolina for some reason. I find myself getting angry at him for leaving the amazing money that he was making in Arizona because he walked away from beautiful opportunities from what I understand. But, selfishly I am quite happy that he did come back because otherwise we would not have met and we would not have made our beautiful daughter and created an amazing life together.
This prompt seems silly to me. How can I write a biography about someone who I am still learning from every single day? Who I have a whole life to live with? Pft. Is this some sort of test? I failed.
January 4, 2018
Editing: “The key to revision is learning to look at your work with an editor’s eye.” – The Writer’s Digest Writing Clinic
This particular view on the art of editing made me realize that I have a serious tendency to develop red herrings. By that I mean that my writing sometimes drifts off into a direction I did not intend or it drifts off and ends up hitting a dead end with nowhere to turn around and then I either lose interest in my project and give up or I delete my passage and forget where it was I wanted my writing to go in the first place. This is definitely a place where I can improve as a writer/story-teller.
January 5, 2018
Biography: “In a time of universal deceit- telling the truth is a revolutionary act.” – George Orwell
I don’t get much from biographies….are they necessary to be good at this trade?
January 6, 2018
Books to Read: “It would be unrealistic to believe that one book could bring a complete change.” – Rachel Carson
This passage has only added another item to my mental list of reasons not to let anyone silence my voice. If you believe in something strongly enough and you fight for it long enough your voice will be heard by someone. Who those ears belong to does not matter so long as you influence a mind other than your own. I look forward to reading Rachel Carson’s book Silent Spring.
January 7, 2018
Writing Prompt: If I could live anywhere in the world…
When I was growing up I always wanted to live in Greece, it was my wildest fantasy that I could think of. I was absolutely fascinated with Greek Mythology and was determined to visit Athens and climb mount Olympus and look the gods in the face just to prove the world of Christianity wrong. I still think it is wrong. I still think that thunder crashing and lightning striking is Zeus throwing a temper tantrum. I still think that the waves in all the seven seas are because Poseidon’s horses are stamping their feet. I believe that all souls must travel the River Styx and stare Hades in the face to meet their eternal fate.
These days I would settle for much less than Greece. If I had all the choice in the world as to where I wanted to live out the rest of my days it would be on a farm that I have created for myself and for my family. I want to make my holiday pies from the apples and pumpkins in my backyard. I want to hear the rooster each morning, no matter how annoying it gets. I want goats to stand on my roof like they have conquered Mount Everest- because to them they have and I will be proud of them. I want to watch my daughter feed a calf through a bottle. I want to watch her laugh as she holds a baby chick for the first time. I want to listen to her squeal as the ducks chase her away from the pond in the springtime. I want to have a root cellar where I cure meats and dry herbs. I want to truly provide for my family and not put that job onto others. That is where I want to live. I want to live in a home I have built from the ground up.